Welcome to the neighborhood!!

This is a letter I wrote to the Editor. I don't know the protocol, and I think its too long, but I thought I'd give it a go anyway. Here's what I submitted on April 30th, 2007:


I began this e-mail seething mad. After I started to type, I realized that this story actually had some humor to it and I should put my anger aside and have fun with it. So here goes.

After working long and endless hours, my family finally moved into our new house on North 5th Street. Our first "welcome to the neighborhood" was having our new checks stolen out of our mailbox. We found this out when our friendly banker called to ask my husband if he had written a check to a plumbing supply company for $11,000. We're lucky if we have $11.00 in our checking at times. The checks were recovered in a drug bust and a detective from the SPD returned them to us. Our second "welcome to the neighborhood" was having someone enter our house (we think with a key) and taking gift cards right out of my wallet. Here's how our third, "welcome" panned out. About 3AM last Friday morning, my 14 year old daughter came tearing down the stairs to tell me that there was some strange old guy (40 or 50 or something by her estimate, funny since I'm 53) throwing rocks at her second story bedroom window. He was doing the Springfield Shuffle (a little wobbly I might add) and telling her to come down and that his name was Jimmy. He had red hair and was a little more than intoxicated. He was riding a little dirt bike. When he sensed she wasn't cooperating, he cut through our front yard and fled south on 5th street.
Pandemonium ensued. I was downstairs at the time, couldn't sleep...making sure that my rock star hubby had all his clothes ready for his gig in Elmhurst that night. Yes, girls, I oversee his wardrobe....anyway...I took the stairs two at a time, (pretty hard for a old lady, huh Halee?) with Ashlee on my heels, she's 12 and a scaredy cat like her Mom. We (all four of us) burst into our bedroom, woke Hank (my other half) ...I was saying "call 911", repeatedly....knowing full well the cell was in its usual place on our dresser. So here I was with Hank, Halee, Ashlee, Alie(Halee's friend) and Shadow, a 14 year old, blind in one eye can't see out of the other Pekeapoo, all stumbling over one another in the dark. We looked like the Keystone Cops. So, we called the police. A nice (cute too) officer responded promptly. He took our info and relayed it back to whomever he talks to on that thingy on his shoulder. He said, "The intruder was labeled a trespasser" , and if he returns he'll go to jail and all of us "Northenders by marriage", Southenders by birth, will be safe again.

So, what next? This past Thursday two of my daughters and I made a dash over to QikNEz in the pouring rain. When we returned my daughters bicycle that she got for her 9th birthday was gone, (please don't say that it was her fault because she should have taken it in when we left because you'll sound just like my ever optimistic husband). So here we go again, called SPD, dispatch sent officer out, he took a report and they'll keep their eyes open. OK...here's the funny part. Last night, we went over to QiknEz again. I was chatting with Toni, the nice lady behind the counter. I was telling her about Kylee's bike. As I was relating my tale of woe, a strange look came over her face. She said "wait a minute...I think I've seen that bicycle." She walked around the back of the store towards the area where they put the trash (right adjacent to the SPD sub-station). Here she comes, wheeling Kylee's bike out. I almost cried. There is was is all its splendor, albeit missing a seat, which was gone anyway when the thief took it. I hope you had an uncomfortable ride. Ashlee and I wheeled it home. Bicycle - $29.99, new seat - $15, Kylee's face when she saw her bike - Priceless.

So, in closing, I want to thank: Two very, observant QikNEz employees, Toni and some really nice guy who gives me pennies when I'm short on change. The Springfield Police Department, in particular, Officers Bob Oglesby, Cloyd, Chris Vollmer, Jen and Zed Langen, the nice detective who returned our checks minus 1, and others whose names I can't recall. Some of those officers helped us out on another matter, but that's a little private for me to divulge in print. Just for the record, Officers Oglesby and the Langens are my husbands little brother, little sister and brother-in-law respectively. As a side note, my husband's father, Harry Stoutamyer, is a 27 year veteran of the SPD.

I love my house on the Northend. I love living by The Dollar Tree, Aldi's, QiknEz, the nail salon, Mel-O-Cream, Family Dollar, just to name a few. I hope I can grow old here with my twin grandbabies, swinging on my front porch. I hope my girls are thrilled that, for the first time in their lives, they don't have to share a bedroom. I hope that people in this neighborhood will walk by our house and say, "Wow, look at all the hard work they put into this place". I hope that this is a safe haven where my 6 children and their respective significant others can feel comfortable walking into Mom's and Dad's without knocking like I do at my Mom's...still, i.e., Captain Nick Babiak, KC-135 Pilot, USAF, Greg and Angie Babiak Lyons, proud parents of the tornado babies, Camryn and Parker, born about 4 days before the tornado blew through Springfield last March, Michael Babiak, (only kid out of the bunch who looks like me) with a good job, a pretty girlfriend and not a bad drummer.

I know that all this could of happened in any other neighborhood on any side of town, so please don't inundate me with irate letters. I know that I'm deliriously happy here in my new house. I know that my flowers and veggies will sprout, no matter what side of town this is. I know my children are genuinely happy here, I know that all the neighborhood kids can count on me to pass out popsicles, cookies, uncooked ears of white sweetcorn, Kool-Aid, and any other food that I might have on hand. And finally, I know that my husband is SO thankful that I'm happy again, cause if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

Maybe I should write my own column.

Thanks for listening,

Linda, Hank, Halee, Ashlee, Kylee and Shadow Stoutamyer
Proud Northenders


Havent heard if they're going to publish this or not, but I'll keep my eyes open!